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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in chicken-fried psychobabble's LiveJournal:

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Saturday, July 7th, 2007
10:15 pm
Hellooo. I miss you guys, my computer isn't set up because there's no room in paul's house for it, so I completely forgot about livejournal up until now. Summary of my life: I'm moving into a beautiful new apartment, still not earning enough to pay for said apartment, been sleeping with random people, and...that's pretty much it, except Sandy bought me a panini press for the new apartment and I'm really freaking excited about that.

Now for the important update: I was going to come home the weekend of the 14th, but now I'm thinking it'll be the weekend after that, unless I find out that I'll miss seeing you guys if I do that. So let me know if you'll be around on the 20th-22nd or not.

Miss you!!
Friday, February 2nd, 2007
3:49 pm
I heart you guys. That is all.
Tuesday, January 30th, 2007
10:18 pm
time to move on
Well, I'm officially out of the old place (AKA the house of sin) and into the new one. It's only two blocks away but it may as well be 40, given that I'm not too comfortable going back to the old house to visit yet. I live with 5 other people, all of whom are complete strangers, albeit extremely friendly ones. I'll have to wait and see whether or not I fit in here, but I remain optimistic.

Overall, I feel pretty good about my decision, living with Ian was just way too stressful for either of us to have to deal with any longer, although I'm going to miss Emilie terribly. Oh well, at least this place is a lot cleaner and it's probably a good thing that I'm meeting new people even though I wasn't prepared to have to my senior year. I'll try to keep you posted on how it goes.

I miss you guys!

Current Mood: nervous
Monday, October 16th, 2006
2:40 pm
Something is Rotten in the City of Burlington
There have been a slew of crimes this semester that have every college girl in Burlington hammering her door shut and buying a bolt lock for her chastity belt.

First attack on the female population:
CCV student Colby Eck, wacked out on acid and ecstacy, gets into a UVM freshman dorm and precedes to run around naked attacking freshman girls. Most girls got off fairly easy - he went into one room and tried to pull a girl's pants off so she ran out of the room, he locked himself in another girl's room grabbing for her crotchal area but she basically just walked around him and got out, too. The unluckest girl of the bunch happened to be walking past the naked guy when he, for no reason at all, turned and slammed her head into the wall. The cops eventually came and had to taser him to get him to calm down.

The next incident also involved letting a non-uvmer into the dorms. Some braniac let a 30ish creepy creep into the dorms, who proceded to go door to door telling girls that he was a sock salesman. When someone was dumb enough to fall for this, he would ask them to try on socks and then kiss/lick/fondle their feet. Super Yuck.

The final incident is no laughing matter. In fact, when my Grandma heard about it she called my mother bawling her eyes out. A UVM senior, exactly my age, left the bars one night, walked down mainstreet (one of the most well-lit streets in Burlington) and was never heard from again. There was a frenzy of searching for about a week before they finally found her body next to the Huntington Gorge. Now, the scariest part of this to me is that she was no naive freshman - she was a senior. This could have been me. They have a pretty definite suspect, he's served time for sexual assalt and she used his cell phone that night and possibly got in his truck. I don't know why in the world she would have done this, since from his picture he is far from being an attractive young man, but it is still really scarey.

Possibly the most disturbing part is that this was parents weekend. Her parents were actually in town, she had seen them that evening, and she was supposed to meet them the next morning. How awful that must have been for her parents to have your daughter kidnapped and murdered while she was away at college, let alone when you were so close to her when it happened. Seriously disturbing.

So basically, everyone in town is freaking out, especially UVMers, and especially girls. No one will travel alone at night, and there is a very Summer of Sam feel to Burlington now.

This is just so weird for a town like Burlington. I always felt so completely safe walking by myself, granted there were eccentric hobos but they never caused any actual harm. Everyone is extremely upset and I hope to god nothing else happens because there might be a mass exodus of people fleeing Burlington for their lives.

Current Mood: gloomy
Tuesday, May 9th, 2006
12:35 pm
like rats jumping from a sinking ship
Everyone is quitting Quizno's...well, except for the two managers...probably because they're the only ones that get paid enough. I've been struggling with whether or not to hop on the quitting bandwagon. I really need to get out of there, but I feel bad abandoning the store like this. My boss can kiss my ass, I don't care about her, but I would feel bad for the managers. My boss is a flight attendant that shows up every couple of weeks to make us scrub the walls and to drive us completely mad. She'll be working with us more in the summer and I don't think I could handle it. Plus the toaster is breaking, so every two seconds it's track stops, leaving some poor unsuspecting sandwich to burn in the middle of it. Also the phone is broken, as is the security alarm, which randomly went off yesterday during a huge rush of customers. Also I get shit for pay and I work harder than anyone (everyone else spends their time sending things through the toaster to see what lights on fire or strapping knives to the spinning tops that come in the kid's meals).

So basically I can't take it anymore, and I want to do something a little more meaningful and hopefully more relevant to my major(s). But I have no idea where to start looking...plus Debbie has made it nearly impossible for me to look for a new job with Ari's camp schedule. I need to work with him July through August on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Wednesday afternoons. So exactly how am I supposed to find another job?

Oye, I dunno. I have to move out at the end of the month. Ian and I are moving downtown with our friend Joe, who reminds me vaguely of Jon for some reason...maybe its because he looks so preppy but he's actually very bizarre. I'm excited. It'll be awesome to live downtown so we can just walk to our friends' houses. I'm pretty sick of being the designated driver, and we'll be living only a few blocks from everyone and everything that matters.

I'm almost done with school, I just have a portfolio of poems and one short story to revise extensively. That's due tomorrow (I should probably get to work on that) and then I'm officially a Senior. Wish I knew what I'm doing with my life...

Hopefully I'll come home for a week in June. I'm hoping to give my two weeks notice from Quizno's three weeks before I start my new job, but I'm probably kidding myself. Miss you guys!

Current Mood: anxious
Wednesday, March 8th, 2006
7:53 am
Luck Be a Lady
So we can add my nose to my ever-growing list of bones that I've pulverized. Oh, indeed, I broke my nose. In Montreal. During a bar fight. And no, I didn't win. In fact, I think I'm the only one the lost, seeing as I wasn't even in the fight yet I was the only one that got hurt. Ian and our friend Joe broke up the fight, and then I went over to keep them from fighting with Joe for breaking it up. I was innocently standing around talking to the guy that started the fight, telling him that Joe meant no harm when the other fellow decided that it was time to start fighting again. He tried to sucker punch the guy I was talking to in the face, but apparently the fact that we were both standing perfectly still surprised him, causing him to veer three feet to the left and hit me directly in the nose. Yeah, it didn't stop bleeding for a half hour, and then it would randomly start gushing again every once in awhile. The guy that hit me must have quietly slinked away, but the guy that started the fight decided to sprint out of the bar (with the little blond girl of a bartender holding onto his shirt as he dragged her behind him). Ian chase after him, Joe and I followed Ian, a random guy (but possibly the guy that hit me) jumped out of a cab and chased after him, and Ian Joe and I got in the cab. We were fine after that except that we couldn't remember which Holiday Inn we were staying in and the cab driver decided to go sixty and run every red light possible saying "Now I have an excuse!" in his delightful Quebec accent. Once we got to the hotel I ended up staying up until four waiting for the bleeding to stop and watching the Naked News that we had decided to order. (FYI, not as informative as you'd think, although that was definitely the first time I've ever seen a topless yoga demonstration)

I felt so shitty yesterday, and a bumpy car ride certainly didn't cheer me up much, especially with the blood and tequila cocktail that I had sloshing around in my tummy. A phone call to Sandy unexpectedly cheered me up, though. Her first reaction was to panic, but then she started laughing and said, "I broke my nose in college, too, only I got drunk and fell off a toilet." I love that woman more and more every day.

Of course, I had planned on writing a paper once I got back to Burlington yesterday, which obviously didn't happen. My prof gave me an extension until Friday night, but my boss still made me work my first shift today, which was wonderful considering I woke up with two black eyes this morning. Oh well, at least I got to tell a lot of concerned customers "Well, he done told me twice" after my "I got in a bar fight" line got old. It would be unfortunate if the cops showed up looking for Ian tonight, but at least I wouldn't have to worry about him elbowing me in the face while we're asleep.

So I should probably get started on that paper...I always seem to use extensions as just more time to procrastinate. But I'll probably just end up taking another happy fun pill and passing out.

Ok kids, stay safe, be good, and most of all, never do as I do, as I seem to excel at making poor decisions.

Current Mood: hurty
Tuesday, January 3rd, 2006
9:09 pm
If I were a dinosaur I would totally swing from vines
Hope everyone had an excellent New Year's. Ian and I went over to our neighbors' apartment (a couple in their late twenties), got completely wasted, got really ridiculously stoned, almost passed out and decided to make our exit. I think we made a good impression.

In other news, Ian and I saw King Kong Sunday night. Um, craziest movie ever. Three hours long...non-stop intensity...T-Rexes swinging from vines trying to eat blond women...you know, the usual. I was really surprised that they managed to make a lot of it really scary. Although I'm not sure I approve of the stereotypical "savage natives," they were still frightening. Overall, I was actually impressed, which surprised the hell out of me.

What else have I been doing? Hmm...relaxing, working, tripping on mushrooms, reading, watching my friends' cats. Not too much excitement up here.

Hope you guys are having a glorious time back in the Roc. I already miss you!


Current Mood: calm
Wednesday, November 16th, 2005
5:23 pm
when it rains, it pours
It was 65 degrees when I woke up at 8 this morning. It is now 40 and pouring. I sure am glad I decided to dress "light" today. Also glad I wore a white skirt...too bad I opted for underwear today, though, that could have been interesting...

In other news, my seemingly unwaranted anxiety about the rear sliding door of the campus bus was very much confirmed just a short time ago when I witnessed an unsuspecting young man get his arm shut in it. At least the driver stopped after only just one block. I did my best to keep my amused chuckling on the inside. But it was hard.

So my car decided to start spraying gas fumes through my air vents. Just in time for me to desperately need heat, even at the risk of passing out in the middle of the highway from the fumes. Ian thinks it's my head gasket (which for some reason always makes me think of a guillotine). If he can find my car repair manual and is able to do it all himself, it'll cost me about $100. If I take it to a shop, probably a couple of thousand. I'd be tempted to "tough it out" except that I feel like I'm playing a fun new variant of Russian Roulette every time I light up a cigarette while driving.* So far I'm winning, but nonetheless I should probably get it looked at.

*Ok, ok, so I've backslid a little bit this month, but I'm back down to four a day and I'll be done with them by Thanksgiving, so you won't have to weep at the sight of me smoking over break. Besides, it was either buy a pack of cigarettes or a rope to hang myself with. I've had a good month.

Current Mood: cranky
Sunday, November 6th, 2005
8:28 pm
Alive and Well
Hello. I'm alive, I promise. Just a little busy...with three jobs, schoolwork, a filthy apartment, and a broken back. And a kitten that likes to bark and pee on the bathroom rug. (I'll provide you with pictures eventually...of the cat, not the pee)

My back's feeling a lot better, but I still have the brace on since by orthopedist decided to LIE TO ME when he originally told me that I'd only have it on for eight weeks instead of the 12 weeks a vertebrae takes to heal. So I decided to cover my brace in stickers so, of course, Sandy sent me about a hundred stickers with puppies and flowers and fairies on them...so I, of course, bought as many fire-type stickers as I could find so I could light all the stickers mom sent me on fire and display them proudly. Plus I ripped the head off of one of the puppies and placed it on a tea tray sticker like kristen's and my old crispin-stalking days.

Now my brace is totally covered in fake blood from the halloween show. Yeah, it's pretty gross. The show was fairly awesome this year, all I had to do was lay under a table with a hole in it for my torso to stick out of. There was a fake corpse body on top of the table so that it looked like I was decaying and awesome. I would lay there and pretend to be dead and then every now and then a zombie would shuffle over and start eating jello out of my corpse whenever a crowd would come by. Good times. (except for getting completely covered in jello for 6 hours every night)

What else have I done lately? Ian and I went as Beetlejuice and Lydia for halloween. I wish we had put a little more time and thought into our costumes, but then again Ian spent like two hours taping black and white stripes on his clothes so I probably shouldn't complain.

The Thursday before Halloween Emilie and I went to see the Dresden Dolls suck on drumsticks and hock lugies onto the stage. Amazing. I had the best time ever. If they ever play anywhere near your immediate area its definitely a show that's worth going to.

And...I have no more to say except I miss you guys.

Current Mood: calm
Monday, August 29th, 2005
5:19 pm
alright...which one of my unborn fetuses stepped on a crack??
The ER doctor just called. It turns out I do have a small chip fracture in one of my vertebrae after all. Sweeeeet.

Current Mood: aggravated
11:03 am
free falling
So i decided to go cliff jumping into Lake Champlain. And land on my back. And spend most of the night before the first day of classes in the emergency room. Nothing broken, thank jeebus, although it freaking feels like it. We were at this place everyone calls red rocks where there are cliffs of various heights to jump off of. I did the 40 foot one. God I'm smart. Although, to my credit I wasn't going to do it, but Ian and Tim talked me into it. I'm trying not to guilt trip too much. Oh well. Good thing I didn't try the 70 ft drop, I guess a guy broke two vertebrae on that one last year.

Oh, and to top it all off I had to climb a freaking rock face to get out of the water and then it was a 20 minute walk in the dark to get back, well 20 minutes because we got lost. Of course. We cheered ourselves up during the walk back by comparing our situation to the Blair Witch Project and scaring the shit out of Crystal. I decided to calm her down by telling her that the only thing that she'd find roaming about in these woods would be a drugged up hippy or two stumbling about. But before I could finish my sentence an enormous figure came sprinting towards us. Yeah, it was like a 9 foot tall hippy with pigtails running at full speed. God I love Burlington.

So considering that I've already thrown my back out once this summer, I do believe that my vortex of clutziness has moved from my tailbone to my head and now to my back. Although I bruised my tailbone pretty badly, too, so maybe its coming round full circle. Anyone know a good chiropractor?

Current Mood: hurty
Tuesday, July 19th, 2005
7:38 pm
Liz's Guide to a Healthy, Successful Life
Volume xxi: Conquering the Food Industry in Five Easy Steps*

Step 1: Don't bother finding out your work schedule in advance. Someone will always call to inform you that you were supposed to be at work an hour ago.

Step 2: When asking your customers a question, never speak above a whisper. Customers have notoriously delicate ear drums.

Step 3: Don't bother asking if you get a free sandwich for lunch. Go ahead and take it! Your employer is sure to appreciate your tenacity.

Step 4: Always accidentally rat out your coworkers when they do something wrong. I find it creates an honest and trusting work environment.

And finally, Step 5: Always feed the health inspector moldy condiments. Especially horse radish. He really likes that one.

*these steps are not easy, could not be accomplished by anyone but Liz, and will not under any circumstances help anyone to conquer anything at all

Current Mood: pleased
Sunday, July 10th, 2005
6:56 pm
Ahh!! Kitten!!!
I have a kitten. His name is Skeeter. He is insane. Ian is covered in scratches. Muahaha.

Current Mood: devious
Saturday, June 25th, 2005
12:13 pm
Show me the nicotine...I mean money
Well Hello There!

We finally got the internet hooked up (fyi: never trust Adelphia, they are the anti-christ) I'm all moved into the new apartment with Ianface, Chris, and Kara...well, almost all moved in...there's still boxes randomly strewed about...and stuff in the garage that needs to be in my room...
Anywho, the apartment is sweet, my roommates are sweet, hell even the neighbors are awesome. I'm really digging this place. Oh, except for one small problem...I can't afford shit. Like food. Or this apartment. Yeah...I have two jobs, alas to no avail. Neither Debbie nor Quizno's (yes once again i am a sammich jocky) will give me enough hours, as it turns out that I'm sharing one person's hours with another girl at EACH JOB. Gahh...so yeah, Ian's been paying for my life. God bless him and the generous commission Radioshack endows him with.

So despite my empty pockets, I've decided to get a kitten (don't try to see the logic in it, there is none) Apparently they're giving them away for free at this random farm in the middle of nowhere. I've been kitty-sitting for Em and Jesse's two little darlings from that same farm, and I fell in love. And here's the funny part: so did Ian. Yes, cat-hating allergies-infested Ian. He was actually the one that suggested getting our own, and paying for half the expenses...yeah that's what made me cave.

Despite how sorry I'll probably be for making this decision once I realize I can't afford to feed the little bugger, one good thing has at least come out of this: I quit smoking. For reals this time. I really couldn't afford a kitten if I didn't. Yeah...nothing like the image of an adorable little kitten in the back of your mind to keep you from jumping out a window every time one of the three heavy smokers you live with lights up.

So this is my life, I'm a little nervous about it currently but I'll try to keep my chin up. I'll just have to follow the inspired words that a random fellow Vermonter decided to bestow upon me as I was on my way to work the day after I quit smoking: "You know what you need more of in your life?" (at this point I really thought he was going to suggest that I do something unsavory with his member, probably because he was wearing a wife-beater and camouflage shorts) "Smiles!" Although I had the urge to punch him in the face at the time, well...ok, so I still want to punch him in the face. What was my point again? Fuck it, I'm going to lick the bottom of all the ashtrays in the house. Peace, suckahs!

Current Mood: aggravated
Wednesday, April 27th, 2005
2:36 pm
Emphysema Boogie
In reflection, I don't think I'm addicted to cigarettes. I think I'm addicted to the idea that I'm killing myself slowly. After all, its far more socially acceptable than pouring a little bleach into your coffee every day as a substiture for cream or sugar. Instead I think I'll smoke every cigarette in the world and become the first 20-year-old to die from emphysema. But only because I care so much about self-image.

Current Mood: cynical
Tuesday, April 26th, 2005
11:22 pm
a word on bugs
I think that humans tend to hate insects above all creatures because above all creatures, they resemble us the most. Think about it. What's more annoying than a mosquito? A bloodsucker that can verbally harass you, as well. Consider this for a minute. Humans feed off each other constantly. What are insults and put-downs but a symbolic transfer of power, of essence, of lifeblood, if you will. We suck the juices from each other to survive, and repay creatures that do the same exact thing by crushing them to death with something as degrading as a shoe or a magazine. If I ever decide to murder someone, I'm doing it with a fly swatter or a tennis shoe.

Current Mood: contemplative
Friday, April 22nd, 2005
5:06 pm
A Drug Culture Celebration Gone Horribly Wrong
So Liz Willome visited me on 4/20, which was Wednesday. Too bad I was up the whole night before losing my mind. Never drop acid in the middle of the week at midnight when you're drunk. That is all.

Current Mood: relaxed
Tuesday, April 5th, 2005
3:02 pm
"you're not doing too well with liquids today, are ya, honey?"
Know what happens when liz is reeeally tired? Oh, she becomes a walking disaster...literally, I couldn't walk yesterday without causing a disaster. Plus I think I broke my foot...but im getting ahead of myself here. Let me start at the beginning.

So the interesting thing here is that my day of disaster didn't really start until after I got out of class at 5:00. Of course, I was completely tweaked out on gallons of coffee all day, which started to wear off promptly at five, so that might explain some of it (my pulse was up to 136 by five, fyi) Okay, so I get back to the dorms and Ian sneaks up behind me to give me a hug...with a mug of coffee in his hand...while I was about to wave my arms back in a stretch...yeah there was coffee every freaking where. Including all over my pants, all over ian's clothes, all over our armchair, and all over the blanket that I had just washed the night before. Oh, I was pissed.

So I change my pants, and Ian and I go out to buy cigarettes and we get in a fight because spilling things on myself always gets me grumpy. I get to my car only to discover that I had left my window open for the rain to rain into. Now, I totally felt the seat and it totally felt dry, but sure enough, five minutes into the drive my left cheek is totally soaked. (totally.)

So after getting cigarettes I change my stupid pants yet again. After dinner I proceeded to vacuum my exceedingly gross floor, while ian picked up all the stuff on my floor for me to vacuum under. Now that might be boring, except next we went up to his room and he vacuumed while I picked up the stuff...so I picked up his thirty pound hookah by the top, forgetting that the top isn't attached to the bottom, and dropped the whole damn thing on my little footsie. Oh, and I spilled foul hookah water all over his newly cleaned floor and all under his bed. Oh, and two seconds later I managed to throw popcorn all over his floor, too. I probably spilled or broke some other stuff, as well, but those were the bigguns.

Not the best day of my life, and not overly exciting, either, but I thought you folks would like to hear that I'm the same as always and I miss having you guys around to laugh at me when I do shit like this.

Oh, and Colleen, I'm seriously considering taking ballet next semester to up my grace just a smidgen - you know, so I don't die so much when I walk. How hard was it? Do you think I'll fail miserably? (I'd ask Jon, too, but he'd just be mean. Or funny. Its kind of a russian roulette of humor and humiliation, really...)


Current Mood: clumsy
Friday, April 1st, 2005
10:36 am
RIP smoky the frog
Oh, Mitch Hedberg, you died and you will be missed. You've made my heart smile for years with your drugged-out antics....too bad you died of a drug overdose. Rest in peace, my friend.

"I wrote a letter to my dad- I wrote, I really enjoy being here. But I accidently wrote rarely, instead of really. But I still wanted to use it, so I crossed it out and wrote I rarely drive steamboats, Dad. There's a lot you don't know about me. Quit trying to act like I'm a steamboat operator. This letter took a harsh turn right away."

Current Mood: disappointed
Monday, March 14th, 2005
11:00 pm
so i only finished one of those papers i had to do, as I spent the rest of the day enduring horrendous stomache pains and then in the ER waiting to find out if I'm dying, and then having the doctor tell me i have the same fucking stomache bug that i've had for three weeks now instead of anything even remotely satisfying like appendicitis. so i got an extension until wednesday on that one paper, but i still have a completely different one due tomorrow morning. And my stomache is still trying to eat me.

And so, in the immortal words of Colleeny: "ALIEN BABY!!!!!" I think I'm gonna try to gouge it out with a screwdriver or something before I get back to work...
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